Should I Tell My Neighbors and Straight Friends That I'm a Swinger?

In a word, "NO" and not No but "Hell No!"

For newbie swingers, the fact you go to parties with your spouse and have sex with other people is a real mind altering experience. Being open sexually and around other people, who feel the same, will quickly seduce you into thinking that everyone feels the same way. NOT!

Funny that America was founded on the ideas of personal and religious freedom, yet we are some of the most up tight people around. A fair percentage of American's were raised in households with strict religious guidelines, especially older people, and these people are often our bosses or neighbors.



One of the things that becomes quickly apparent is that most swingers are very open and understanding of our differences. They tend to be more tolerant of others even when they don't have the same kink that you do.

For example, a couple we hang around with are gay and until you have close gay friends, you never realize how tough it is to be gay. No one in their right mind would choose to be gay and it is cast upon them at birth by genetics. The people who tell you that people decide to be gay are wrong and you can never "pray the gay away".

Our friend said that as a young child, he realized that he was different and didn't feel the same way as other boys. As a teenager, he dated both sides of the fence until finally in late teens he realized that trying to force himself to be straight wasn't working.

We go out to supper with them all the time and for our friend and his partner, it is great because they can sit together. Typically if we are sitting in a booth, wifey and I can sit on one side and they can sit on the other. Nobody thinks a thing of it while if they were by themselves they could not sit together on one side of the booth. When he told me that, it floored me because it never dawned on me that if I was gay, I could not sit with my partner without people making comments or staring.

Depending on the statistics you read, 5-8% of the people are gay or swingers. The number is about the same for both groups. Who knows how accurate the surveys are because it's something that most people don't openly admit or advertise. This means that 95% of the population are against us, so to speak.

Some people are forced together by circumstance, such as living next door to each other or working at the same place. So if you fuck up and tell your next door neighbor that you are a pervert and they go out and start building a wall between your houses, you know that they will not be inviting you over for cards and to play hide the weenie.

So before you attempt to invite a neighbor into your circle, make sure as best you can, that it will not end badly. Once you've been in the lifestyle for a while, it should get easier to pick out couples who might actually be interested. Tread lightly and slowly.